At 55 years old, I got my first ever dog. Clemmy. Well, she wasn’t meant to be mine. But, even on the journey home, Clemmy chose me. Perhaps she thought I knew how to do this thing. She was wrong—I had a LOT to learn.

Puppies Don’t Know Night from Day

At this point, I’d raised three birth kids and some extras, so I thought I was done with sleepless nights. But puppies want cuddles. And why would a dog sleep at night when sleeping all day on your person’s lap while she works on the computer is so much cozier? Yeah. I learned that it’s good to have a playtime in the evening and then cover the cage with a blanket. I even learned to tell her to “go to bed.”

Puppies Don’t Know What They Should Eat

I thought dog babies were different from human babies and figured that they would have instincts about eating. Apparently not. Clemmy was under the impression that green strawberries are food; various mushrooms growing in the backyard are food; and even the nuts falling from the Sago Palm tree are food. The green strawberries didn’t seem to have too much untoward effect—except that we never got to eat any ripe ones. The mushrooms were hallucinogenic, and she was often very crazy—until we realized Clemmy was shrooming and got rid of the mushrooms. The palm nuts almost killed her. They certainly killed the carpet, the walls, and, well, I’ll stop there since you might be reading this while eating.

Puppies Learn as They Grow Up

In my ignorance about dogs, I figured that they understood limited commands (the person who gave us Clemmy told me to speak to her in one-word barks). But I was used to children and grandchildren—people. So, I always spoke in sentences. “Do you want to go for a walk?” “Go to bed.” “Time for your bath.” As a puppy, she sometimes struggled with obedience. But she learned very quickly so that, when I recently added up the words or phrases she understands, they totaled over 100! She also learned by watching. Before going for a walk, we get our shoes out of the cupboard—she also goes in and out of the cupboard before her walk. Because that’s what you do.

Bulldogs Need Special Care

I knew going in that bulldogs can have issues, because I’d read up on line. They tend to struggle with skin problems, breathing issues, and obesity. They can be EXPENSIVE! At first, I used special shampoos, food, creams, etc. Then, I found that human stuff is good enough. Clemmy now has her weekly bath with Head and Shoulders. It controls her tendency towards the yeast infections that cause a bulldog’s reddened skin and unpleasant odor wonderfully. As she grew older, Clemmy developed dry eye. The dog medicine was VERY pricey. But human eye drops work well. For food? She loves anything, but especially green beans, chicken (no bones), rice, banana, etc. Her only complaint is that I never give her enough!

Having a Dog is Hard Work, but Worth It

Clemmy is now 10 years old—almost at her expiry date. I am pleased to say that she still seems healthy, even though she sleeps a lot. She also has some gray hair. Honestly, so do I. And she still amazes me. She has a different bark for wanting to go out to pee; something came from Amazon; she wants to play; and someone is at the door.

She continues to understand more and more. What do they mean, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks?” Clearly, you can!

For example, the other day I was talking to myself and muttered, “It’s time for Clemmy to go downstairs.” (I needed to vacuum, and she enjoys pulling the hose off—pretty annoying.) I have a gate across the stairs, because she’s too old to go up and down at will. To my astonishment, she nosed the gate open and went down. And here I thought the gate was a barrier. It’s not. It’s clearly only a symbol.

We always put Clemmy away before dinner because I can’t handle the begging. She now runs for her room when she hears the timer saying food is ready. Or if she overhears me ask my husband to put her away. I’m sure it has nothing to do with the fact that, when she goes, we give her a treat.

Since a bath means four treats, when I take her towel out, Clemmy runs for the bathroom. Why four? Obviously, because she can count.

Clemmy continues to surprise me with all she understands—I sure would love to get into her head and know what she is thinking!

Learn More about Clemmy

Some of you will know that Clemmy is the star of her own children’s book series. Soon, I am hoping that she will make some appearances at the Fairfax, VA and Grapevine, TX farmer’s markets and maybe even local schools. Meanwhile, you can read more about her and see videos at her own special website here: https://clemmy.org. Let me know what you think, and I’ll tell Clemmy!